Happy 1 Year Anniversary!

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DINuAWoxy4Q

For our anniversary, we enjoyed a long weekend at FJ's parents new place in Myrtle Beach. It was sooooo relaxing and the weather was perfect. Of course they all lucked out with a permanent designated driver, but I actually had a great time and along with foregoing any beach cocktails or cocktails with dinner, I also passed up the hangovers and foggy heads!

We left Wednesday night and stayed through Sunday. We ate a ton of food and spent some time in the sun each day whether it was bocci ball on the beach or one of the pools at the resort. FJ actually ate some seafood and liked it and we got a lot of much needed rest.

We broke the news to FJ's parents that we wouldn't be able to join them on their 20th anniversary trip to Europe. We had all planned a Mediterranean cruise and our tickets for the boat and the airfare were already booked. Luckily we are canceling in time to avoid fees. The trip is scheduled for mid September and while I should still be early enough in to travel, we figured that going to a foreign country for a week and the costs associated were not smart decisions given our situation. I was so excited about the trip so I was really sad that we had to cancel.

Before we left we also started planning a housewarming party for June so we're really excited to have people over to see the house and also about the chance to see some of our friends that we haven't been able to see in awhile!!

We have our second doctor's appointment tomorrow and I'm so excited and so nervous all at the same time. Even though everything should be fine and we got rave reviews at the last appointment, there's a small nagging fear that this has all been a dream. If my physical condition is any indication, we are moving right along! Ha ha! I've gained about 4 pounds so far which is in a good range. Especially considering I've slacked off on working out or eating right. The past few days I have had terrible nausea and sickness (not limited to the morning at all). I read an article that said this week (the 10th) is probably going to be the worst as far as feeling tired and nauseas. I hope that's the truth but unfortunately there is no definitive information out there.

Our appointment is at 9:40 tomorrow morning so if everything goes well, we will start spreading the news shortly after! I'm really excited to share the news with friends and family. I'm even more excited to stop being so noncommital and flaky when I'm invited to wine tastings, happy hours and things I would normally jump at! I'm actually pretty proud of myself for keeping the secret for this long. I didn't think I had it in me.

8 weeks and counting

I can't really figure out when I go from week to week. I don't know if it's on a Tuesday or a Thursday or a Saturday. If you know me at all, you know I count down. It's just a thing I do. I count down to vacations, my birthday, Christmas, my birthday, my wedding, my birthday. I even countdown to my countdown (ie: it's 2 days until it's less than a week till_______). It's just one of the things that I do.

I have NO clue when I go from week to week! I went to the doctor on a Friday and she declared me 6 weeks. I go back on a Wednesday which she referred to as my 10 week check up. My due date is on a Thursday. This makes no sense to me and is obviously driving me crazy! So I'm calling myself 8 weeks this week. I guess I'm supposed to start glowing next week at 9 weeks, but from what I have read that means that my face will be flushed from extra blood flow and my skin might get oily. This really doesn't sound exciting! I thought that pregnancy glow referred to being happy, which I most definitely am, but I didn't realize it was a real, medical thing. I guess I have a lot to learn!

I still haven't picked up a book. I'm pretty sure that it'll be bad for everyone involved when I do. And we all know I'll pick and choose what to believe. For example, I've decided that despite what the doctor said, feta cheese is fine, but I'm sticking hard core with her belief that I can't do yard work because of the rare parasites in the dirt or something to that effect -- I just know FJ was in there when she said no gardening/yard work!!

Speaking of, side note, our colors were approved for our house so we'll get to start painting the outside soon. By that, I mean that we'll get to pay someone to start painting the outside soon! Too bad I can't help with the yardwork that needs to be done before the painters come...

After this paint, we are a half bath and some landscaping away from being done with the house for awhile. We still have a lot of work to do with decorating and upstairs. Obviously, we'll have a nursery to put together. But still, we get a few months off! We've done so much to the house since we bought it so I'm really excited to show it off and have a party in June!

There's really no exciting news at this point. I'm trying to keep going to the gym even though I'm ridiculously tired. I'm starting to get my regular appetite back. For awhile I was eating whatever I could tolerate the thought of which was a lot of what I consider junk food (I love it, but it's junk). I'm sure I used the excuse to indulge a bit, too...who wouldn't?! I finally was able to go to the store this week and bought some stuff to munch on at work to make sure I can keep something in my tummy. I'm excited about all this dairy and grain that I haven't really had regularly for the past several months! Yogurt, cheese, triscuits, cereal!! I still can't handle raw meat so I'm still not cooking, but I'm taking steps back in the right direction after my 2 weeks of total nutrition abandon.

There has been an interesting development. My partner at work was set to go on maternity leave in mid June. I knew that there would be a lot to handle this summer while I worked our module solo, and even more when I realized I would be pregnant while doing this. I still haven't spilled the beans at work and wasn't planning on it until the end of the month. My partner went out earlier this week and is on bed rest. We're about 95% positive she's out for the count and not coming back until October. This means we didn't get to do any of our transition planning so this week has been a bit of a storm, but it's calming down!

I'm really excited for our anniversary trip to the beach next weekend! We leave on Wednesday night. The forecast is rainy all weekend so I can't understand why I can't catch a break with the weather and the beach, but I'm looking forward to relaxing with FJ! His parents recently bought a place at the beach and we're going down with them. We're all bringing the dogs so I won't have to worry with the hassle of boarding Tucker, either! I'm really pumped about this trip and am counting down the days (literally) till we leave!

I'm also excited that we'll get to spend 4 days with people who already know our big news! Once we get back, I'll have to get through 2 more days then we go to the doctor on Wednesday and as long as everything checks out, we will let all of our friends in on the big news!

This weekend we are getting ready for the painters to come and going to a wedding reception for a friend of FJ's so I'm sure it'll fly by. May 26 will be here before I know it!!

Another week down!

I've determined that the reason people don't reveal that they are pregnant until the 12th week is because if women knew about the first trimester, they would stop procreating all together! Okay, it's not THAT bad, but I'm amazed at how quickly things have changed. I'm frustrated with food because I'm used to planning my meals in advance, grocery shopping, cooking, etc. I like the routine of it and the control behind it. I can't do that right now and I've had to reintroduce foods that I haven't really been consuming regularly in months so that can't be helping how lethargic and gross I feel!

I don't have any "cravings" just aversions to foods. And they aren't constant, they are on a whim. Figuring out lunch and dinner has been interesting to say the least, but I think FJ's enjoying falling off the healthy eating bandwagon for awhile! And I must admit that I've been enjoying the excuse to munch on abnormal quantities of Mexican food. Side note, my doctor put queso dip in the list of cheeses to avoid. I'm pretty sure she's gone absolutely crazy and perhaps that is a cultural barrier she doesn't get. She's Canadian so I'm convinced that she doesn't understand the importance of Mexican food in American's diets! Just work with me here...

For the past several months, people at work have told me that I'm next to have a baby (pretty sure AT&T is running a fertility clinic...there are always a minimum of 5 pregnant people in my vicinity and they cycle them in and out)...or they go the other way and tell me that I should wait and enjoy time with my husband. It's one of those things I learned a long time ago that everyone has an opinion about this. Similarly to folks chiming in when we planned the wedding, it goes a lot faster and more smoothly if I just let them go, nod and smile. But now I am laughing to myself as people make their predicitions and give me advice. If only they knew!

I'm still very tired, but I'm getting used to it and getting in a better pattern with sleep (BORING). I had given up all cokes/sodas for awhile, so I'm secretly enjoying my morning ginger ale. I didn't feel great this week so I didn't get to work out a lot, but got in a good workout yesterday after work and it felt great so I know I need to get back to it! It'll definitely help out!!

It's definitely getting more and more difficult to keep the secret! I feel terrible misleading my friends but I know it's for a good cause and they'll understand. I can't wait to be able to share the good news! We are hoping that we'll be ready to tell after our next doctor's appointment which is the week before Memorial Day. I am just willing time to go by between now and then and trying to stay busy, but under the radar. I might even venture to a pool this weekend or next. I'm definitely not "showing" but I'm also definitely feeling and seeing the effect of eating out and eating foods I had previously reserved as treats or cheats for pretty much every meal.

We have a 5K tomorrow (the Susan G Komen Race for the Cure) that we signed up for before we knew that we were pregnant. I figured it wouldn't be a big deal, the race is at 8:30...but I found out that we have to be there at 7am for team pictures. We are running on a team for Wachovia/Wells Fargo and a lot of folks from FJ's leadership team will be there so I originally signed up for this to support him. So we have to get up at 5:30 tomorrow and it'll just be a gamble as to how this turns out. Hopefully I feel great and the race is fun!!

So finally, another week (work week at least) has come and gone. We're 7 weeks and counting. We've got the race, Mother's Day and some friends' parties this weekend. Next weekend we have a wedding reception and the following week we leave on Wednesday for Myrtle Beach with Joani and Mark (FJ's mom and step dad) for a long weekend to celebrate our anniversary. So I'm pretty sure the next few weeks will fly by and we'll be able to share the news in no time! In the meantime, I'm plotting how I will torture a few folks when I tell them the news... if I have to sit on this secret for a month, then I'm going to have a blast telling our friends!! Muuuhahahahaha!!!

The Big News!!!

So I've decided that even though we're keeping this a secret for a few more weeks, I wanted to go ahead and start a blog. It's not like anyone will follow it, even after I send out the link!! I wanted to make sure I documented the journey to share with friends, family and maybe way down the road - the baby!!

I guess I'll start from Thursday, April 22 when we found out. I had a beach trip planned with a girlfriend (Kate), her fiance and her brother. We were headed to Orange Beach for Mullet Toss (the fish, not the hairstyle... I know, I was disappointed a few years ago when I figured that out, too) for the weekend. I knew that there would be some serious boozing going on. I had been on a pretty strict lock down with CrossFit and Paleo (those of you who know me know what these things are...for those who don't - CF is an exercise regimen that focuses on functional movement at high intensity and I've been doing it for over a year and a half and am actually a coach...Paleo is a way of eating -- I hate the word diet -- that promotes lean meats, veggies, some fruit, nuts, seeds and oils from nuts and seeds) so I knew that I had to pick my battles wisely. By battles I meant cocktail consumption. I planned to stick to the food part of the diet, enjoy some beers on the beach and try to lock it up at night. I hadn't had more than a glass or two of wine a week for a month so I knew I was in for a long weekend.

I knew I should have probably welcomed my monthly visitor that Monday and it was Thursday. I've never been particularly on time in any aspect of lie and this was no exception. I decided to take a test just to ease my conscious. I had done this once before and knew to expect that negative line, the one that goes the opposite direction of the control line, to light up within 15 seconds as opposed to the 2 minutes they suggest you wait. As I'm imagining my first cold beer on the beach while talking to Kate about her upcoming wedding and people watching in Lower Alabama, I saw the wrong line pop up. I decided clearly I didn't remember this correctly. Till his friend the other line popped up. At that moment I remembered that there could only be false positives, not false negatives...or maybe it was the other way around? Well, I had another test so I shrugged it off, grabbed the third and last test in the box, took my mind back to the white sands of Orange Beach and Kate's impeccable hula hooping skills and started on the second test (I'll spare you the details). The positive sign came back up. I was immediately kicked out of my imaginary beach and back into the reality of the half finished half bath in our half put together house. It occurred to me at that exact moment that we had lived in the house for right at 6 months and while we had done a LOT to it and had just the week prior gotten some furniture and new lighting, we had a long way to go and there was crap everywhere. If you know me, you know the wave of panic I felt. And of course, I thought I had gone completely crazy and that I was about to freak FJ out for no reason. I was already embarrassed for the inevitable doctor's appointment where they told me I had made the whole thing up and there was a rare spice that turns tests positive that I had used on a pork tenderloin or something. Our child is going to have a great imagination, by the way.

I called FJ. He didn't answer. I had actually had customer appointments all day that Thursday and to make matters worse, it had been a very stressful week at work so I was so tired and exhausted that I had almost fallen asleep during both of the afternoon meetings! I never do that, I'm actually really interested in the technical aspects of my job and try to learn from the meetings. Plus it's not a very effective sales tactic to fall asleep during a meeting. I called FJ again. No answer. I cussed at the phone and called FJ again. I thought that would obviously make him answer. A few seconds later and 5 missed calls, 1 new number. Stalker Wife! So I put on my brave face, got out my wallet and got out my trusty Kaiser card. I swapped insurance January 1 from UHC to Kaiser. I thought right then that maybe things like THIS were the reason I should have declared a primary care physician by now or scheduled my annual girly doctor visit that was due in January. I made a mental note that my ignoring my previous mental note to do those things was a bad decision.

The folks at Kaiser were great which was a total surprise since the health care industry in general scares me and has not always been hospitable. I told them what was going on in pretty plain terms and that I knew I needed to see someone at the Alpharetta campus of Northside Hospital. The put me in touch with the right folks and I began to make the appointment. The first nurse I spoke to asked me the usual questions (I had no idea what those were until I was asked them about 14 times...then I determined they were routine)... first day of last period. March 1. I knew that one. But I told her I wasn't a 28 day girl. I'll spare you the specifics, but I knew the timing was off. So she told me they would see me. I was waiting for her to say "It's 4:15, can you make it in by 4:30 so we can confirm you are crazy?" when she suggested May 17. She nearly got punched through the phone. I explained to her that I needed to confirm what was going on because I could very well be wrong. She transferred me. The next woman was a bit more my speed....she took things down a level and told me they don't see you till week 8. I asked her about confirmation and she asked if I peed on a stick. I said yep. She asked if I got a plus sign. I said yep. She said "congratulations, you're pregnant!" I laughed and said, no, I needed real confirmation. She then straightened out my previous confusion by letting me know that there are not false positives, only false negatives. Remember that one ladies (Suz and Kate - you know what to do here).

So I talked her into letting me come the following week and ignoring my long cycle info and she let me ask her a few questions. During all of this time, FJ had called me back, I spit out the news and both of us were absolutely dumbfounded. I was worried about how FJ would react, but he was really excited and surprised and that made me feel TONS better. I still wasn't sure how I felt... I still wasn't convinced I was pregnant so I didn't want to feel anything just yet at the risk of seriously disappointing myself.

I immediately went to CVS and spent another $30 on digital read out tests of various brands. I got home, took one more and it pretty much screamed "stop peeing on $20 bills, you are PREGNANT!" That was that. Now I had to dispose of all of the evidence because Kate, Reid and Will would be there in just a few hours.

FJ and I decided that I would still go to the beach. I am fully capable of having fun without drinking and it wasn't dangerous to me or "my situation". Come on, it wasn't planned and it had been 2 hours...neither of us knew quite yet how to talk about it! We went for a celebratory dinner and just talked about everything. It made me feel a lot better and I was letting myself get a little excited!

The beach weekend was a bust, but it provided me some cover! It rained the whole weekend which allowed me to excuse myself from my much talked about sunshine beer. Kate knew about the paleo and CF challenge and was really supportive, so no questions were asked. I even went out the first night (open air bar, no risk) and drank a few Sprite and waters. I'm not sure if anyone noticed that there was 0 alcohol consumption, but nobody called me out. It was great because I got to spend some time with Kate and Reid and ask all about the wedding and the honeymoon. It was actually really relaxing to hang out with them and I had a really great weekend!

So I'll fast forward through the next several days.... we all know I'm an information seeker. I like to be in the know. I went to the internet to try to figure out what was next. It occurred to me that while one of my best friends, Allison has been pregnant twice and I saw her almost daily through both (we work together and have for 6+ years), I never knew until she was 12 weeks so I had no clue what those first couple of months were like. Not only did I not know what to expect, I had NO clue how far along I really was! This frustrated me to no end and I had to wait until Friday, April 30 to figure it out!

Friday came pretty quickly and our appointment was first thing in the morning. Of course FJ was going with me and he was really excited, too. I had experienced a little nausea and had been extremely tired. I also had some wonderful trophies on my face in the way of 13 year old girl acne. So all in all, it hadn't been that bad yet. I have to admit that I was terrified that I was going to go into the doctor's office and they were going to start the exam and let me know that I wasn't pregnant and had really dreamed the whole thing up and used a batch of bad tests (or 3).

But to my surprise and delight, the appointment went even better than expected!! We found out that we were 6 weeks along rather than the typical 8 weeks of the first visit (he he he, kinda figured that one out already!). I'll skip over some of the gory details, but we got our first sonogram and were able to see the "BABY!!!" as Dr. Harwood labeled it on our sonogram picture. It's tiny! As an added bonus, we actually were able to hear the heartbeat!!!! It was 123 beats per minute which is apparently a very healthy range, so that was really exciting and definitely confirmed that I'm not crazy! At least not when it comes to this situation.

So we were flooded with info, do's, don't's and also asked our fair share of questions. Now we pretty much wait as I get to experience all these less than pleasant changes in my body and the side effects that come with pregnancy. We have another appointment set for the end of May and we'll be 10 weeks around that time. Hearing the heartbeat took out a huge factor of risk for us and we are feeling a lot more confident about planning for our future and our family!

Here are a few questions that I'm sure folks have and some answers to these questions...

Q. Are we going to find out if it's a boy or girl?

A: Have you met me? I don't do well with surprises and can't stand suspense!! Of course we are going to find out!

Q. When do we find out?

A. Somewhere around week 20/Month 5, so we have a ways to go.

Q. Do we think we know what it is?

A. FJ is convinced that it's a girl. I have no clue, but we've both started using "she" because "it" is a little cold. I still throw in the "or he" here and there.

Q. How's it going?

A. So far so good. Sickness is not limited to the morning and I've had to reintroduce a lot of complex carbs into my diet. My tummy is happy with the starch, but my body is not reacting well to the change. I've not been able to plan ahead for meals and grocery shopping becuase not enough things sound good to me at any given time to plan. I'm not having cravings, I'm just having negative reactions to certain things.

Q. Are we still going to keep working out and trying to eat healhty?

A. Right now, I'm eating whatever I can stomach, so unfortunately my paleo lifestyle has taken a back seat. From what I hear and read, my tummy should be back to normal (well besides being visibly larger) in 1-2 months, so hopefully I can get back to my routine. As for exercise, I'm exhausted right now, but am trying to stay active. Because I was active before, I should be able to maintain but as of right now I get winded walking up the stairs to our second floor. Crossfit has a CF Mom's regimen that I hope to stick to and I might add some more swimming and up the running a bit. I'd really like to stay healthy. FJ will probably eat whatever I eat and work out a ton and get a six pack while I get bigger and bigger since that's just the way this stuff works!

Q. Do we have names picked out?

A. No. We've each vetoed a few, but we haven't gotten that far.

Q. Due date?

A. December 23, which oddly enough was FJ's original due date. He was born on Jan 1. But it's looking like a happy holiday at the Tribuzio household this year one way or another!